#1 Big Bald Head == Small Business Owner (With a ....View?)
Apparently, in the world of marketing, nothing says small business like a thin man with a huge bald head. Oh, and don't forget the open button-up shirt topped with a gleaming smile. And for the final touch, add a bunch of blurry buildings and you've got yourself an Icon sure to sell to lots of small business owners!!!
What can I say that has not already been said. Oh I know... where's his glasses? That guy stole them (below)!
#1-B Big Bald Head + Glasses: It Gets You A Cute Assistant
....And apparently he is so happy about it because now he can see just how pretty his little helper is. (Kinda like santa claus without the elves).
|Yep, it looks like Mrs Claus is going to be working overtime tonight hoo-hoo!|
#2 Average Looking Middle Aged White Guy == Tech Worker
The San Francisco Bay Guardian said it best, a man with a combover in a suit and tie bought at sears must be... thats right, a tech worker!
I'm sure if you could smell this picture it would probably smell like old spice and used condoms. What a country, what a country (it always sounds more believable when you say it twice).
Did you notice the background? Probably... does this mean every tech worker is also a hacker, and does so during work hours? I'm not sure if this was added in before or after the photograph was taken but it is obviously someone's idea of labelling the 'poor' white guy as a hacker. However, this one won an award for something, probably for hacking some bank and making their security 1000% better and is about to give a speech saying how elite he is because he knows 50,000 programming languages (but can't talk to girls).
#3 Sweaty Tall Thin Track Athlete == Reliable???
#4 Room of Old Fogies = Heros of the Internet
No im serious! The link to this picture is actually: https://www.icann.org/assets/hero-home-page.jpg and is on their main page! If you think it is not right that a company do something like this, then all they have to say to you is "ICANN". If you know about the internet and it's origins and rulers, then this is pretty obvious but for those who don't know, they are the one's holding everyone by the balls. These guys? who knows... maybe!
#5 White Folks are Dumb?
Not really marketing but still a flagrant and ignorant racist picture all the same. You know racism doesn't just affect people who are not white, and I wish people would stop it already. There's nothing I hate more than racism.
#6 50+ Woman with Short, Permed Hair == Smoker
Why is it that smokers are either Skinny young Hollywood models or old farts? EVERY smoker I know looks like neither of those. But I have to say, if blu was trying to attract business with a shriveled up prune who has obviously gotten that way by smoking, then they might just make people not want to do either. Hey racism is wrong but there's nothing wrong with making fun of old people!
#7 1950s == american dream
Why is it that this country (USA) seems to think that the 1950-1960 decade was so great? Constantly showing ads like this trying to make people be "happy families". It makes me sick, the only difference from here and now is: 1) people don't hide how they really are anymore 2) women don't just make dinner and take care of the kids 3) christmas does not mean we need 2 christmas trees!!! (see above) What's the same? This is: 1) Apparently americans are still dumb enough to let their kids use a stepladder by a open fireplace 2) Giving your kid a giant necco wafer before bad and then complaining they wont go to sleep! Where's the parent? Probably the one who took the picture, and probably drunk, the proof is in the pink elephant to the left :)
#8 Only Black People Get Aids???
If you are like me, you have noticed that just about every HIV/AIDS ad you see usually features a person of color. Why is this? And it's not just the inner city, I live out in the countryside in a semi-small town and guess what, our ads are just like that. In fact, the best you can get is the ad with the "group" of people, but guess what, only 1 white person... while the other 10 are from various minorities. I DARE THE AD INDUSTRY: Make an HIV/AIDS ad that shows a single white guy in a suit and tie. Guess what, it wont happen. Not because yuppies don't get AIDS, but because nobody wants to admit that they do. In fact, for all we know, they might get it more.... statistics that gather ethnical information is voluntary, and I bet my bottom dollar that white collar men do not check the box, or worse, lie (to make other races look bad). Yes this world really is that messed up.
#9 Young School Kids are Perl Programmers
AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST....
10 - Google's (anti)Racism!
This really is not a stock photo by itself. This is a weird concept that Google has going, probably in an effort to not be tagged 'racist'. When you search for 'blacks', for example... they dont just show people, they show 'the color' and 'the cars' and 'black screensavers'... yeah right. Nice try google. Then when you search for white, its all "laundry"... but grey is even more interesting when you tag group of in each category.... **
10-A - BLACK GROUPS ARE ALWAYS DEPICTED IN CHURCH OR GANGS (TWO EXTREMES)??
|Is it a church, a gang? You be the judge... you never thought for a second that they were all state judges!|
|If white people were all really like this, I think I would have shot myself by now... but it's pretty damn sad to depict them that way!|
So that's my presentation on the 2014 pictorial stock photo awards. If you find any of this interesting or have any interesting photos to submit for 2015, I would be happy to use them. I usually start this article on Valentine's Day and try to End it by Halloween (forgot to click the Publish button this year!!). Just get them to me by then and you'll be all good.
Credits (I am doing non-commercial credits only)
** For those of you who think I am somehow being racist you need to know one thing: everyone who thinks the word 'racist' is one. I just thought I would say that before google goes and tears down my page for some technicality in the 'acceptable use policy', which is in the eye of the (usually smug) beholder. It's freakin' 2014, get over it already, bit deal.... wow.. our skin is slightly darker or lighter than someone elses... i mean COME ON!! But seriously, I'll be the first to admit it is fun making fun of those who are still in the stone ages ( : ) ) and you KNOW who you are!! (nudge nudge American Goverment).
Sited Resources and Research Associates (thanks for your contributions***)
"Only Black People Get Aids??"
Author: Fuzzy English (Daniel G.)
This was an ongoing project for me, I started it on February 14, 2014 and ended it in Nov 6, 2014. It was worked on for a few hours a month, however, I hope you appreciate the work I put into this post :) *** nothing here, just kidding!