First, a confidential location somewhere in the USA, a girl says that the students that busted their asses all year doing hard work and finishing everything EARLY get to watch movies for the rest of the year/quarter. A great reward since most of them are educational to some point and are also entertaining as well, and we all know positive reinforcement is a good thing. BUT NOOO-oooo; Someone had to go and ruin it for everyone as usual. An angry mom of one of the kids says 'they are watching TOO MUCH television, and should be doing classwork! Without regard to all the work they did, more in a day than some do in a whole quarter, but no that isn't good enough for this sadistic mother who only gets off on other's misery and woe. What a great person, right? Wrong! She needs to be taken to 'basement court' and taught a lesson by the jury!
Go down to Virgina and you will find a Mom, who's antics have all the crazy moms going about judging kid's candy collecting on halloween on a need-to-have basis! That's right, not long from now, there will be scales instead of doormats at everyone's front door on halloween! If you are outside of your target "acceptable" body mass range, you will NOT get a treat... how's that for a trick?
What's next? Stockings with I.Q. tests attached to them? If you fail, you get coal! Tooth fairy now counts cavities on your tooth under your pillow and deducts one QUARTER for every one... so if you got a dollar before, you can bet it will be 50-75 cents if you ate candy alot and forgot to brush your teeth (or are cursed with bad teeth). Oh yes, and the easter bunny won't be hiding any eggs this year, this time they will be hiding themselves... from that mob of crazy parents from VA chasing them down the street!
Now I'm all for education and health, but this is crazy. Remember the south park episode about the Christmas concert. It's a reality, my kids don't get to sing Xmas songs anymore, we have a "Winter" program. They even got yelled at for doing joy to the world, so they had to sing it without the lyrics that had any religious implications. Now we aren't doing an Easter one either, its now the "Spring" program. Can't wait to see what the heck they are going to sing about there... what? Trees and grass... but don't say Bunny for Christ's sake! (oops i mean for heaven's sake.. oops i mean for... ah forget it!
Screw you crazy Moms, all of ya!). There --- I said it... this one is for you crazy moms out there:
Take those ideas of yours, roll them up into a long cylindrical shape and...
...Shove It Up Your Butt!
Make Sure It's The Blunt, Sharp Way First!
PS: I was doing some pictures for this one, but it just ended up being WAY to graphic if you know what I mean. Knowing me you probably can guess what I'd put up so it's probably best I don't. (for example, it involved me doing some
Photoshoping Gimping* around with mom's heads doing things they weren't actually doing, that's all I'm gonna say).
* because I use GIMP not PHOTOSHOP
 THIS IS A COLLECTIVE WORK, IT WAS STARTED MARCH 10, 2014, AND PUBLISHED ON MARCH 12, 2014. THANKS TO ALL THE SOURCES THAT HELPED MAKE THIS ARTICLE POSSIBLE.